


The Kids

by brangelina_of_the_gallaghers



Series: Mr G [8]
Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Student/Teacher, Babysitting, Established Relationship, M/M, Teacher-Student Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-16
Updated: 2015-12-21
Packaged: 2018-04-15 01:20:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 9,723
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4587591
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brangelina_of_the_gallaghers/pseuds/brangelina_of_the_gallaghers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ian and Mickey babysit Debbie's twins.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The 'Best'

**Author's Note:**

> Set 9 months after graduation. There's a big time jump but I'll be going back and adding some fics between this and The Glasses.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Legit made myself cry writing this and I knew how it was going to end. I'm sorry but just trust me and read to the end of the chapter, its not as bad as you think.

"Mick!" Ian shouted, walking from the bedroom to the living room.

"Ian!" The boy mirrored, emerging from the kitchen. "What's up?"

"How do you feel about kids?"

"Gallagher!" He warned. "We've been dating less than a year. I'm not up for starting a family with interracial babies and fucking dogs in fucking sweaters."

Ian laughed and approached his tense boyfriend. "I'm not asking you to adopt anyone with me."

"What then?"

"Debs needs a break and asked if we'd look after the twins."

Debbie had become pregnant on the day of Mickey's graduation and broke the stereotype of teenage mother, raising the children without needing the asshole boyfriend that left her when he found out he was going to be a father. The babies were slightly premature meaning they needed a great deal of care, something that had drained the girl and left her in need of some relaxation.

Mickey groaned. "How long for?"

"At least five days." Ian said tentatively.

He groaned again. "Why can't Fiona deal with it?"

"Debs just needs them out the house."

"I get it. You can't say no to family. If Mandy had asked I'd say yes."

"So we're okay to take them?"

"Five days?"

"Five days." He confirmed.

"Fuck it. Let's do it. What about work?"

"I was thinking I'd just fake I'll for a week."

"Remember the last time you pretended to be sick to take the day off?"

"It was a good enough reason and worth actually being sick. Gotta keep my boyfriend happy, right?" He closed the gap and snaked his arms around Mickey's waist.

"Yeah." Mickey's arms found the redhead's shoulders. "You're pretty good at it."

"So are kids always off limits?" Ian whispered, trying to break it in softly.

"Too early to talk about this. I want to get as much as I can with you before you leave me."

"Why would I leave you?" Ian grew concerned, pulling back to make eye contact.

"You practically scream 'dad' and I never want kids. And I'm not only saying that because I'm still a teenager. I've never wanted them. I don't want to be like my father."

"You wouldn't be him, Mick. We both know that. And I'd still be with you if you didn't want kids. I probably wouldn't love the kid as much as I love you anyway and I'd be a shit dad."

"Sorry." Mickey buried his head in Ian's shoulder. "I don't want to make you compromise just to be with me."

"I don't care about kids enough to break up with you. Promise."

"This conversation is too serious for now."

"I know." The redhead chuckled. "I'll call her and say yes."

"You gotta make it up to me, Gallagher."

"Oh yeah? What do you want? Another strip tease? 69? Hard and fast?"

"All of the above."

"That can be arranged." Their lips joined and there was a messy mix of tongues, lips and teeth.

"Not right now. You gotta go to work."

"Tonight. We're going to fuck for about six hours."

"Think my ass might need a rest, Firecrotch."

"Then I'll just have to overwork your dick." He gave a last quick peck before pulling away and walking towards the door. "I love you!" He shouted as he opened the door.

"I love you, too." Mickey returned before he heard the door snap shut. The thoughts whizzing around Mickey's head were 83% negative. He loved Ian and Ian loved him; that wasn't a problem. But Ian wanted kids and Mickey hated the small, noisy, messy things. Ian would be a great father but Mickey would be a shit dad. Ian could do better than Mickey. "I'm a fucking idiot." He mumbled to himself, unsure whether he thought himself an idiot because he thought Ian wouldn't want him or because he thought he was good enough for Ian in the first place. "Fucking idiot." He repeated before leaving for work himself.

\---

"We need to talk." The younger man said as his redhead walked through the door that night.

"That sounds serious. You better not be breaking up with me." He laughed, confident that that wasn't the reason for the tension obvious in his boyfriend's shoulders. Mickey looked to the floor with a slight blush, not responding. "You're break up with me?" Tears filled the redhead's eyes but he refused to let them fall. "Why? What the fuck did I do?"

"Everything." He paused. "You do everything you have to to keep me happy."

"How is that a bad thing? I just want you to be happy."

"You shouldn't be trying to please me when I can't help you. You can do better, Gallagher. You should do better. So I'm leaving you for your sake."

"Mick, I love my life. I love you. I wouldn't change a thing."

"You don't see it like I do. I see a gorgeous man who's amazing and perfect in every way possible that I really don't deserve because I do nothing for you. I'm now doing something for you. It kills me to know this is what that has to be but it's true."

"Mick, you do everything for me. You looked after me when I was sick and depressed and make me dinner and curl up with me every night and all the little things like laughing at my lame jokes and that's why I love you. Why I need you."

"You can find some other guy for that. Someone who does all those things and more. Someone who's hotter and has more money and your sister likes and isn't just some short, worthless ex-thug. You need to let go of me."

"No, Mick. I'll always want you and need you and love you. You're the best thing for me."

"Sorry." Mickey wiped a year from his eye and he headed for the door. "I'll be back for my stuff tomorrow and I'll leave my key."

"Don't."

"I've got to."

"Where are you going?"

"Home. Dads not there. I'll be safe."

"Mick-"

"Bye, Gallagher." He left and shut the door behind him.

Ian rubbed his palms against his eyes, trying to stop the tears flowing before giving in and letting the waterfall run down his face. He just lost the best thing in his life. He legs collapsed underneath him and he fell onto the couch, mentally willing himself to not get depressed. It took about three minutes, determination to the brim, to get up and decide to go after his boyfriend. The storm inside him wouldn't settle and he needed his life raft back.

-

On the other side of the door, Mickey was slumped against the wall next to the door of his (soon to be ex-) apartment. Tears streaming down his face, he didn't care who saw. Thugs don't cry, right? Maybe he really wasn't a thug anymore. Ian was what he needed. Ian made him a better person. Ian was the love of his life. That's why he had to remind himself that this was best for Ian. The door flew open and Mickey looked up and made eye contact with his (ex-)boyfriend's red, watery eyes.

"I need you back, Mick."

"Leave me alone, Ian. It's for your own good."

"Don't be and idiot." He leaned against the wall and slid down to sit next to the younger man. "You're an amazing person. You're brave and smart and strong and funny and cute and domestic and cuddly and just so damn amazing. You need to believe that. You're the best thing for me and always will be. You're better than any of my exs and they were the rich guys you talked about and see how that worked out for me. You are what I want. You are the type of guy I need. I need you to understand that. It's been nearly a year, Mick. Why would I wait this long to break up with you if I thought you weren't good enough?"

The question was rhetorical because Mickey couldn't answer. Too many tears were running down his face for him to remember how to breathe. "So just come back Inside with me. It's your home, Mick. And it wouldn't be my home without you there with me; without your furnace in my bed; your Poptarts in my cupboard. Just come back inside." He stood up and reached his hand down towards his boyfriend.

After a few minutes of deliberation, Mickey took it.

* * *

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This isn't really linked to the rest of the story. I thought I'd just bring commitment issues back into it. It's happier from here on in, I promise.


	2. The Sparks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is super short. Sorry.

"Never do something that stupid again." Ian said as he wrapped his arms around his boyfriend's waist. They were laid in their bed, curled up and revelling in the fact they were still together. "You're an idiot." He muttered, kissing his boyfriend's hair. "I love you."

"I love you, too."

"You've got to believe me. Okay? We're amazing together. So don't be an idiot and please live happily ever after with me."

"Okay." He quietly agreed. "Sorry."

"You break up with me again and I'll literally beg you to take me back."

Mickey chuckled but didn't reply. Instead, they lay in silence, absorbed in each other and ignoring the world around them, not caring if it didn't come back into view ever again. Being together was all the mattered.

* * *

"Debs wants to bring them across this afternoon."

Mickey groaned. "Five days." He said under his breath. "Okay."

\---

"Thanks for this." The younger redhead said as Ian opened his front door.

"No problem. It'll be fun, right? You love your uncle Ian, don't you?" He stroked Amy's hair. "And I'm going to try and stop uncle Mickey from swearing while you're here. It'll be a challenge."

"Fuck off." His boyfriend muttered from where he was sat on the couch.

"It's going to be harder than I thought." Ian laughed. "Come in." He finally said to his sister. "Hey." He waved a Gemma. "Go relax, Debs. We got this."

"Thank you." She placed a kiss on her brother's cheek. "Bye bye." She waved to her daughters and left.

"Uncle Mickey, you going to behave?"

"Uncle Mickey isn't their uncle." His eyes practically shot daggers.

"Well I'm uncle Ian and you're gunna be with me forever and ever so you're their uncle to." He said in a childish voice.

"Forever and ever?" He said curiously, taking a step closer to his boyfriend.

"And ever." Ian asked. Their lips were about to meet when one of the babies started to cry.

"Gunna be a long five days." Mickey sighed pulling away. "You're dealing with this. I'm not going anywhere near their shit."

"But uncle Mickeyyyy." Ian gave a cute moan when his boyfriend walked away.

Mickey slammed the bedroom door behind him and Ian sighed. 

"A long five days." he said under his breath, picking up the blubbering infant. 

* * *

"Make it shut up." Mickey moaned, walking in from their bedroom. Not long after Amy stopped crying, Gemma started, and it was loud and irritating and Mickey's rationality was hanging on by a thread. "I'm going to go insane, Ian."

"Don't you mean  _Iansane_? The redhead laughed.  "Okay, maybe it's getting to me." His laughter died. "Can you just take her for a sec while I go pee?"

"Just put her down on the couch or something. Maybe we put the TV on, put a beer in her hand, she'll calm down." He awkwardly joked.

"Mick, please."

"Fine," Mickey caved when he saw his boyfriend's puppy dog eyes. "but I'm not happy about it."

"Then I love you even more for it." He handed over the baby and jogged off to the bathroom. "And no swearing!" He shouted from the other side of the door. 

"Fucks sake. Right, little shit, could you please shut up."  _Fuck not swearing_. He thought. 

To his surprise, the tears stopped, the whimpering died, and the baby fucking grinned at him. 

In a moment of weakness, Mickey wiped a tear off of Gemma's cheek and started to sway. 

"Have I gone deaf?" Ian emerged from the bathroom not long after he heard the toilet flush. 

"No. I'm just amazing." The younger man tried to shrug it off, acting as though he still didn't care. 

Inside, however, sparks were flying. He was practically alight with the thought of someone, albeit a baby, liking him.

And that was really lame. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thought this was kinda cute and it's going to get cuter. And soon hopefully. I'm working on chapter 3. 
> 
> The _Iansane_ part was a play on something my friend and I do to things like our name (they're the same) and it leaked into my writing. It's lame and I'm sorry.


	3. The Feeding

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the next update. It's not particularly long and not particularly significant but here it is.

SUNDAY NIGHT

Mickey managed to make it through the first day with the infants with a shred of sanity left. They couple climbed into bed, exhausted, later than usual. The crying didn't cease until later than Mickey had hoped and all chances of sex were dissolved. "Four more to go." He groaned.  

"You were pretty good today." Ian returned. 

"I didn't do much, man. I made one of them shut the fuck up once and didn't drop either. I didn't go anywhere near their shit and you bathed them by yourself. I didn't really help."

"You helped more than I expected you to and their both still alive, you didn't storm out or anything. Anyway, you can go to work tomorrow and get away from it all."

"You sure you can cope without me?"

"Pretty certain. I used to look after Liam on my own."

"The kid's eight."

"I meant when he was younger."

"You're out of practice, old man."

"Shut up and spoon the shit out of me before they wake up again." Ian redhead rolled over and enveloped his boyfriend in front of him. "I could sleep for a decade."

"You better not. I'm not dealing with this shit alone and I'm not getting up more than once in the night."

Ian grinned, pulled Mickey closer to him and kissed the back of his neck before falling asleep.

Mickey remained awake for a little longer, cherishing the moment of quiet, curled up with the man he loved. Maybe kids weren't always bad.  

* * *

MONDAY

Raucous wailing woke Mickey up. He sat up rapidly, ready to run. Then he remembered where he was. He was home. He was safe. It was just the small menaces that had torn him away from his slumber, not his monster of a father. 

He swung his arm around and hit his boyfriend's muscular stomach. "Go on, Uncle Firecrotch."

Ian groaned and pulled himself out of bed. "They're both crying. You gunna help. It's a two man job."

"You're easily worth two men."

"Fuck you."

"I'm going to need them to stop crying before I can get it up. Then we fuck." He muttered, falling back to sleep.

"Lazy fucker." The redhead whispered to himself as he left their bedroom.

They'd left the girls in travel cots in the living room, tucked in and warm. Ian hummed a soft tune as he approached the babies. "Hey, you guys. You gunna stop crying for Uncle Ian?"

Obviously that was a no.

"Alright, alright, what's up?" The rhetorical question was followed by another round of tears.

After checking if either of them needed changing, he settled on the couch with one girl in each arm. "How about a story?"

He thought back to the stories he wished he'd been told as a child. Imagining how that life could have been. What if Monica hadn't kept dumping a child and leaving? What if Frank wasn't an abusive alcoholic? What if he'd gone to live with his real dad?

"Three little pigs maybe? Has someone told you that yet? I think you'd probably like that more than the stuff I read. Gatsby is boring as hell." He asked as if either one would be able to give him a response. "I'll tell you anyway. There were these three pigs-" and so began the fairytale.

When Ian crawled back into bed, the rugrats asleep again, Mickey was awake and staring at the ceiling. "You're kinda cute." He said barely audible. "Uncle Ian did a good job."

"Thanks." He curled up on his boyfriend's chest, head over his heart.

* * *

Tears woke the couple once again a little after 7am. This human alarm clock wasn't so bad because Mickey's actual alarm hadn't woken him and he didn't want to be late for work. "Fucks sake." The younger man groaned.

"Took the words right outta my mouth. Fuck you for having a job."

"You said you could cope."

"I can. I just love spending time with my boyfriend."

"Those small ginger fucks will keep you company."

"They can't keep me company in the way you can." The ginger winked. "I can't cuddle with them in bed or make out with them in the shower."

"Speaking of that, when can I have your dick again?"

"Jeez, Mick, you're like a carnal Vesuvius."

"That means horny, right?"

"Yeah, it does."

"Then, yeah, I am."

"We'll satisfy you later. I gotta go make silence now." He pulled himself out of bed to still the children. 

\---

Mickey rushed around and did his morning routine whilst avoiding getting to close to the crying children before going over to help.

"Go make the small things their food Gallagher." He took Amy out of his boyfriend's arms "You're hungry, right?" He turned to the baby. She stopped crying. "See."

"Don't get bossy, Uncle Mickey." The redhead went through to the kitchen anyway. "You feel like changing Gemma?"

"In your dreams." He shouted after his boyfriend. "Don't take this personally but I ain't goin' near any of your shit." He said to the child still lying in her travel cot.

"Mick!" Ian warned. "I don't want their first words to be swears."

"They ain't going to remember this when they start talking."

Ian got to work warming their milk in the kitchen, contently listening to the hushed noises his boyfriend and nieces were making. A large grin grew on his face. Maybe his boyfriend didn't hate kids after all. 

It didn't take long for him be ready with the milk and head back through to the living room. His grin grew even more when he saw the younger man sat down with a child in the crook of each arm and his head leaned back against the back of the couch, eyes shut.

"Tired you out, Mick?"

"Little bit." He yawned, loud and wide.

"Well that was attractive." The redhead laughed, going over to remove one of the twins. He bent down and placed his mouth over his boyfriend's slightly parted one. "Someone's not cleaned their teeth." He commented once he'd pulled away.

"Someone's not made me a poptart yet."

"Lazy fucker."

"Fucking hypocrite. You're allowed to swear and I'm not?"

"Shut up." They kissed again. "Feed Amy."

"Which one's that?"

"The one you're holding, dumbass."

"I was joking."

Ian settled down next to his boyfriend and their morning suddenly became more relaxed. They fed their respective children and kept to idle small-talk before Mickey headed out to work.

"Remember to call in sick." Mickey placed a quick kiss on his boyfriend's cheek before all bur running out of the door, shouting a quick "Love you."

And Ian was left alone, outnumbered and ready to clean up their shit. "He's kind of an arse but I love him anyway." He told the babies. "Like I really really love him. He's going to be a great uncle. You're going to have to get your cousins from Fiona, Lip, Carl and Liam though. Uncle Ian isn't going to have any children." He said in that voice people use to talk to babies. "He's right though. I need to call in sick. I'll be right back."

* * *

  
Mickey cherished the silence on his way to work. The walk to the bus stop was short and cold but peaceful. It allowed him to think of all the little things; things him and Ian did together, things he loves about him, things Ian loves.

Ian loves the kids. Ian wants kids.

Ian's going to have kids. He finally thought. He was okay with it. He wanted to be a dad all of a sudden. It'll be perfect.

\---

He walked into the shop with a smile on his lips but sleep in his eyes.

"You look happy for someone who looks so tired." Kash immediately pointed out.

"Yeah," Mickey laughed awkwardly, "we got some kids at home and I'm still adapting."

Things had lightened up in the shop through time. Kash's grudge seemed to dissipate and the dark cloud lifted. There was still the occasional awkward silence after talking about their mutual lover but, all in all, things were a lot easier. 

"Kids? It getting really serious between you two? I didn't even know you were thinking about it."

"Nah, they're not ours. Debbie needed a break. We've just got 'em for a few days. I'm no dad."

"From what you've said recently, Ian seems like he'd be a great one."

"Yeah, I know."

"So you planning on adopting?"

"That's really none of your business." The younger man finally snapped.

"Sorry." Kash raised his arms in surrender.

"We're not talking about this anymore." Mickey walked behind the counter and took a seat on the stool.

\---

The next hour passed in almost complete silence. A few customers came in, a few drug deals went on, and he sold a few boxes of cigarettes to underage, teenage boys. It was a fairly mundane and, quite frankly, he missed the chaos of home.

 **Mickey, 1153**  
**Hows it going Uncle dumbass?**

 **Ian, 1233**  
**Make them stop!**

  
**Mickey, 1235**  
**Cant. Sorry. Wish I could though. I'm so bored.**

  
**Ian, 1246**  
**I'd appreciate boredom. It beats hecticness.**

  
**Mickey, 1249**  
**Hey Mr English teacher, is hecticness even a word?**

  
**Ian, 1310**  
**This isn't funny, Mick. I'm not thinking straight, okay?**

  
**Mickey, 1315**  
**I'll get home as early as I can. I'll see what towelhead says.**

  
**Ian, 1332**  
**Thanks x**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been itching to write what I have planned for chapter 5 for ages so hopefully my next few updates will be faster.


	4. The Car

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not very eventful and not brilliantly written but necessary for the next chapter.

"'ey, Kash." Mickey shouted from where he was sat behind the counter. 

"Yeah." He emerged from the back room. 

"Mind if I skip out like a half hour early? Ian's swamped."

"I guess. Can you cover for the next forty-ish minutes? I got a thing."

"What's your thing?"

"Don't ask and I'll let you out an hour early."

"Deal. Just so you know, if it's illegal, I don't give a fuck."

"I think you would."

"Come on, what is it?"

"A guy."

"And that's illegal? Just in your religion though, right?"

"He's a little younger than me."

"Ian 2.0?"

"Completely different."

"Because you're older now?"

"Because it's nothing serious. Just leave it, okay?"

"Yeah, believe it or not, I'm not too riled up by underage relationships anymore. Dating your teacher at 17 does that to you."

Kash laughed. "Thanks." And he left. 

 

**Mickey, 1546**

**I'll be back as soon as i can. He said i can leave warly**

 

**Mickey, 1546**

***early**

**Ian, 1549**

**They're actually asleep. Looking forward to you coming home though**

**Mickey, 1550**

**Miss you too**

**Ian, 1552**

**❤ x**

 

Mickey smiled at his phone, butterflies filling him from head to toe.

**Mickey, 1555**

**Sap**

* * *

"I'm home." He sang as he stepped through the door. 

"Shhh. They're sleeping." Ian approached his boyfriend.

"Still?"

"Thankfully."

"Aren't you supposed to keep them awake during the day so they sleep at night?"

"That's awfully paternal of you for knowing."

"Shut it, Gingersnap." 

"Yeah, you are but the crying must've been driving the neighbours insane so I thought I'd let them sleep for a bit."

"Well, it's about time we woke them up because I'm sure the neighbours would like to sleep tonight." He took confident strides over to the babies. 

"They're not going to like it. They're going to cry a lot."

"Then let's go for a drive, calm them down and get them away from the neighbours."

"Can't we use this time to have hot sex instead?"

"Yeah, okay." Both hands found Ian's chest and Mickey pushed him back towards the bedroom as he leaned up to join their lips. Their kissing got rougher and Mickey moved faster, movements getting sloppy. Then Ian's back hit the wall with a great deal of force and he cried out in pain, waking the infants. 

Tears killed their previously growing erections. "Fucks sake." The brunette muttered as he took some steps back. "The sooner they go home, the better."

"Don't be so down. They're adorable and you know it. I know you know it." 

"Fucking fine. They're adorable. Doesn't change the fact I'm, as you called it, a carnal Vesuvius."

"I know. We'll get rid of them soon."

"Let's get them in the car." They both took a child and a car seat and headed to the car. 

"You're quite smart, Uncle Mickey." Ian said as the engine started and the crying stopped. 

"I know. Just don't drive for too long because they'll fall asleep again."

"I'm finding this whole responsible thing hot."

"So, if we were parents you'd be in a permanent state of arousal?"

"Probably. Guess it's a good job we won't be. I won't be able to keep my hands off you." Right on cue he ghosted his hand over his boyfriend's dick. 

"I've been thinking about it and I think I'd be okay if you wanted to go and adopt or something. Not soon obviously, but eventually."

"Well I've been thinking, too. I don't think I want kids."

"Well we've flip flopped." Mickey laughed. "I just want you to know that I'm open to it now, I think."

"I'll keep it in mind. And I'm sure you'll be a great dad - regardless of your own - but I think I'd prefer to be an uncle than a dad. I like it just being the two of us. And I like our small-ish apartment and I don't want to change anything."

"Okay. I'm not going to complain. I like it, too." 

"We'll just babysit or some shit."

"When they're old enough to clean their own shit and sleep through the night. And I call dibs on favourite Uncle."

"You've got a lot of competition there and I don't think Lip'll like it."

"Lip can suck it."

"I'd like to be the only one to suck it, given that you're my boyfriend." Ian joked, whispering as if the babies would understand. 

"Trust me, you're the only one I'll let suck it. Kash might want it sooner or later."

"Oh yeah? He going to get it?"

"Nah. I think I can resist. He's into kids again though."

"The fuck? Fuck sake. I'm going to come to work with you tomorrow and talk to the fucker." His not swearing policy went straight out the window and speeding down the road behind them. 

"Ian, it's fine. We dated when I was underage. Talk about double standards."

"But he's in his forties. I'm only 25."

"As long as it's not rape, I'm okay with it."

"Right. Fine." The redhead sighed. "As long as he doesn't try it with you."

"I'm pretty sure he won't. You should have seen his face when I said we had kids at home."

"Jealous?"

"Pretty sure."

"At least he knows we're serious."

"He definitely knows. I'm thinking of finding something else though. Something less boring."

"I'm with you whatever you want to do." 

And Mickey knew he didn't just mean at the Kash n Grab.

\---

The girls quietened down as they looked through the windows of the car in the dimming evening, something hypnotising about the passing streetlights. They headed home before their eyes began to close again. 

* * *

They climbed into bed the second night, more exhausted than the first. They'd feed and changed the children and get them to sleep and rushed to get in their own bed. They were about to dose off and right on cue the crying began. 

Ian moved to get up but Mickey pushed him back down. "I got this. Go to sleep, Gingersnap." He placed a quick kiss on his boyfriend's cheek and slipped out of bed. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter will be cuter. Promise.


	5. The Fairytale

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You might think this is boring but I really enjoyed it. It's not meant to be well written because it's Mickey POV - that might just be my excuse. 
> 
> Here are my words of wisdom.
> 
> I hit over 2k on this chap and that's rare so it's mini celebration time.  
> 

"What's with the noise small things? What's it gunna take for you to shut up for me? So, Uncle redhead is pretty good at telling stories, huh? Is that what you want me to do?"

Mickey reluctantly approached the crying children. 

"Stories about heroes are his thing, right? I think you need as story about a real hero though." He picked up a child in each arm and settled on the couch. "Let's call him Brian. Now, Brian grew up in this shitty part of a town. He had a huge family - three brothers and and two sisters. They had a mum and a dad that didn't care about them a lot. Their mum, let's call her Mona. Mona liked to spread her legs. Mostly to Hank, her husband, but sometimes to other guys. At least once it was with Hank's brother. And, that time, she got pregnant with Brian. 

"Obviously, she didn't tell Hank and when Brian was born, he thought he was his own kid. But when he was 14, Brian found out that Hank wasn't his father. Hank didn't like that one bit. He treated him like an outcast; like he wasn't part of the family anymore. Eventually, Hank started using Brian as a punchbag.

"Brian's torment made him want to get better at fighting so he joined JROTC and learned how to handle himself. And guns too. This made him want to enlist and join the army. This was obviously a stupid fucking idea. Anyway, it turns out Brian had these monsters in his head; obstacles that he had to jump over to realise that the army wasn't what he should be doing.

"He read a lot when he was younger, He'd read all these stories about great adventurers that went off and did heroic things. They were heroes. And he wanted to be a hero too. He was just going about it in the wrong way.

"Soon, his army dream came crashing down on him. Now, I'm not one to want to wreck people's dreams but I'm really happy Brian failed. Because if Brian had stayed out in one of the Stans, he wouldn't have had chance to be a real hero.

"You'll learn that being a hero isn't the same as defending your country and killing the bad guys. It's about doing something brave, it doesn't matter how small it is. Brian's brave thing didn't happen until after he made another huge fucking mistake. He decided to dance for these old guys and a lot of them wanted a piece of his fine ass. Well, not ass, that's a figure of speech. They wanted his dick. And I can't blame them, he has a great dick.

"He finally went home when he'd had enough of dancing. It took too long but he did go. And his family welcomed him with open arms. His siblings, who were technically half-siblings, treated him like a kid though. And he wasn't a kid. He was just struggling. So, Phillip, Deborah, Carlos and Francesca danced around him, trying not to offend him, they knew what was going on because they'd seen it before. Mona had done some stupid shit. She tried jumping off a roof because she though she could fly. I'm glad Brian never tried that. So, yeah, they knew what was going on but he wouldn't listen. He could be a real ass sometimes. Actually, he still can. Never tell him I said that though.

"So Brian eventually ended up in bed for days on end. He didn't want to move and he though everyone hated him. Leon, his youngest brother eventually went to see him and he started crying. So Brian got out of bed and hugged the little guy. He battled his monsters. And that was the first sign of recovery. From then on, he tried harder to battle them. They weren't like horror film type monsters. They were invisible. It made them harder to fight. But he fought and he fought and soon they were gone. Sometimes they come back but he's a real monster slayer now so he knows how to get rid of them. 

"But fighting the monsters wasn't all that made him a hero. Don't get me wrong, everyone thinks he's amazing because of it, but that's only half the battle. He then had to learn how to recover from the initial downfall. What was he going to do next?

"He started reading again, more advanced books this time. And he remembered just how much he loved reading. He remembered what it was like to get tangled up in a world better than his own. He remembered how he felt better after reading a story about someone whose life was worse than his. He mentioned how he saw what was good in the shittiness of  _Great Expectations_. 

"That's when he realised that getting lost in these worlds, exploring different realities, was something he could see himself doing for a long time. And what if he could help other people younger than him from the monsters of this world? So he decided to teach.

"He'd run off to join the army before he'd finished high school so he was under-qualified. But he was smart, very smart, and everyone knew that if he tried he could pass any exam he wanted to. Phillip was smarter in Brian's eyes and even he dropped out of high school at one point. Fiona, I mean Francesca, only had her GED, also having dropped out. She was a bit of a superhero too but that's a different story.

"So Brian wasn't confident enough. Now he knows that was stupid because, despite the monsters in his mind, he's always been amazing and everyone else has always believed in him. He's really lovable. Anyway, they managed to persuade him to at least get his GED and he aced it obviously. And because he lived in a shitty town, no one as very smart and he got a job at the school easily. So he started teaching English. 

"And he did exactly what he wanted to do. He helped. At least, I know he helped one person. This guy that he helped was trapped at home with a father he hated. And Michael's father was worse than Hank. Jerry hit Michael a hell of a lot. Michael was always bruised for no real reason. Sometimes Michael just wouldn't go home. He'd find somewhere else to sleep. He ended up doing a lot of stupid shit. But Brian made him want to go to school. Mostly because it helped listening to things other people, albeit fictional, learned how to deal with their problems. And it made life not seem so bad.

"So Michael was pretty much falling in love with this guy, not that he knew it. Then it turned out that Brian was giving him more advice but he didn't know it was him. See, Amanda had given Michael this number but it turned out to be the wrong number. It was Brian's number. By the time he realised who he'd been texting, he was in too deep. He knew that he shouldn't want to be with Brian - he'd been breaking the law - but he really liked the guy. 

"Brian was obviously the smart one so he put a stop to it, said that they couldn't text anymore. But even heroes are allowed to have their weak moments and Brian ended up asking Michael to meet him at a club and then invited him back to his place. The longer it takes for you to find out what happens when you take someone back to your place, the better. But it's not actually for coffee. So, Michael and Brian had coffee and Michael headed home. He wanted to stay with Brian in his comfy bed but he was too scared to be happy. Jerry had made him think he didn't deserve to be happy. 

"But Brian was a hero again. He didn't kill the bad guys, he didn't fight to keep people safe. He wasn't even fighting his own monsters to keep himself safe. He fought Michael's monster. A dragon to be precise. Michael's monster was visible, it was easier to fight and Brian knew how to fight it. Brian put his shield around Michael as well as himself but he also taught Michael that he didn't always need a shield. And Michael let his guard down when he as around Brian. 

"Brian ended up caging the dragon instead of slaying it. He taught Michael more. Taught him that violence wasn't always the answer. Violence was what the dragon had taught him but it wasn't actually how you solve your problems. If you're not violent, you don't get into trouble, you don't ever need your shield. And that's how you live happily ever after. 

"Brian and Michael ended up making a life together. They fought off monsters together. These monsters were ones who though Brian and Michael shouldn't be together. These were a special breed of monster. They're called homophobes. But Michael just called them assholes. Brian showed Michael how to fight the homophobes. Once again, violence wasn't the answer. Homophobes like attention. Just like some other monsters. Racists, Junkies, Bigots and murders are good examples. So, if you don't pay attention to them, they disappear. Brian was better than Michael at that. For some reason, Michael cared too much about what other people think. Real heroes don't care what people think. They just do what's right and it doesn't matter if people don't like it. 

"So, the morals of the story. What are they?" He asked. After a few moments of silence he continued. "I'm beginning to think you weren't listening, girls." He laughed. "The morals of the story are: sometimes it's okay to like other people's lives more than your own. Envy isn't always a bad thing. Changing something in your life to make it happier or wanting to get out of southside isn't bad. If something stands in your way, try harder, don't give in. Wanting to help others is great but make sure you're okay first. Sometimes you're your own priority.

"Violence isn't always the answer. Most of the time it's better to cage the monster than kill it. Some monsters can be saved but most aren't worth you time. It's okay to be different. It's okay to rely on someone else. Someone will always be better than you at something. It's okay to ask them for help. It's not okay for someone to hit you so don't let it happen. It's okay to lower your shield when you know you're safe. It's important to have someone you feel safe around. Don't blame yourself for things that aren't your fault. Other people are sometimes right, don't get too big-headed, listen to them because they might speak sense. 

"Finally, if you you want to do it, try your hardest and you'll succeed. Even if other people don't have  faith in you, have faith in yourself."

The girls had stopped crying long ago, soothed by Mickey's voice. He spent a minute staring into their bright green eyes before putting them back down into their temporary bed and going back through to his bedroom. 

"My boyfriend tells stories with morals." The redhead laughed. He lay awake, staring at the ceiling with a grin on his face. "That's cute."

"You heard all that, huh?" A blush spread across Mickey's cheeks. What could be more embarrassing than your boyfriend hearing you tell a story where he's the hero? "The whole damn thing?"

"Yeah. All of it. You're adorable,  _Michael_." Ian rolled closer to Mickey as he finally climbed into their bed. "I prefer Mick to be honest."

"How about we shut the fuck up about this now? It's embarrassing. I didn't mean to boost your ego." He tried to tried to roll away, turn his back on his mortification. 

"It's cute, okay?"

"I'm not cute." He insisted, voice laced with adorableness.

"You really are. I love you."

"You, too." Mickey dosed off on his hero's chest. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not sure what's going to happen next. There may or may not be another chapter but there definitely will be another fic.


	6. The Change of Plan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Im sorry that the update was all messy but I hadn't meant to post the chapter yet. I was planning on adding more before posting so it was supposed to be longer. But I've cleaned it up now. 
> 
> I'm also sorry about how long it's been since I updated last

Day five 

The couple pulled themselves out of bed when Ian's alarm went off.

"Mick, I have to go to work." The redhead said when a calendar event popped up on his phone.

"You got a problem there then, haven't you? Namely the two small crying things."

"There's a meeting I have to be at that I forgot about."

"They think you're sick. They're not expecting you."

"I haven't called in sick today though. I need to be there and I can't exactly take them with me."

"You want me to handle them alone?"

"Just for one day. Debs will take them home later and we can go back to normal. Call Kash and take the day off. Be honest, tell him you need to look after the kids. It's not like he'll fire you. I need you to do this for me." The redhead took a few steps closer to his boyfriend.

"You dick. You know I'd do anything for you."

"So you will?" He tucked his thumbs under Mickey's belt loops and pulled the boy closer.

"Of course I will." He leaned up to join their lips. "But you owe me." He said as he pulled away from the soft kiss.

"I know. Thanks. I gotta go in like 35 minutes. Can you make some coffee before feeding the girls? You'd be the bestest boyfriend ever."

"I'm already the bestest boyfriend ever, you dork. I put up with your stupid freckled ass." The brunette quipped as he pulled away.

"You love my ass."

"Not as much as you love mine."

"Yeah. You're right." Ian gave his boyfriend a firm smack on the left cheek. "Now coffee."

"Fine." He emerged from the bedroom and quickly went over to check on the infants before going through to the kitchen to make his boyfriend coffee.

He heard the teacher fussing the babies a few minutes later. His boyfriend really was adorable.

"Hey, Uncle dumbass." He shouted from where he was washing a stray plate at the sink.

"Yeah." Ian made his way through to the kitchen and wrapped his arms around the shorter man's waist.

"Want some toast before you head out?"

"Please." He nibbled at Mickey's neck.

"You know that turns me on. You want me to keep you at home? Ride you into the mattress?"

"If only." The redhead sighed. "Tonight, you ride."

"You dork.

"I know. I really miss the sex though."

"Yeah, me too. But we've lasted longer than this before. We didn't fuck for weeks, remember?"

"Yeah. They say you don't know you need something until it's gone."

"True. I'll make you some toast, you deal with the kids, then you go to work, then Debbie picks them up, then you come home and we fuck until Monday."

"Sounds good. I know you'll be okay with them while I'm gone. Uncle Mickey is kinda awesome."

"This'll be the first time I've had to deal with their shit though."

"You've seen me do it. You know how."

"Doesn't mean I want to."

"Which makes it even better that you're going to."

"Right. Fine."

"You're brilliant."

"Believe it or not, and not to feed your ego, but that's all down to you. You changed me, Gallagher."

"Good. I'm pretty amazing like that." He pecked his boyfriend's lips. "I'm gunna finish getting ready."

Mickey let his boyfriend slip away and continued making breakfast. He'd made the twins' bottles by the time Ian emerged from the bathroom.

"Toast and coffee is on the side."

"Mickey's feeding everyone but no one's feeding Mickey." Ian states in a sympathetic tone.

"Mickey will feed himself once he's finished feeding the babies."

"Uncle Mickey to the rescue." The redhead retrieved his breakfast from the side and began to devour it as fast as he could.

"Dork."

"I know." They settled next to each other on the couch. "You look good with kids." Ian's voice was full of admiration.

"Yeah? Something you want to see more often?"

"Nah. I'll let you play uncle every so often but not daddy."

"You won't let me?"

"I want it to just be the two of us forever."

"M'kay." They shared a quick kiss before Mickey put a bottle to Amy's lips.

"I love you."

9"I love you, too," the boy responded. "Go to work, Gallagher. We'll see you later."

"Okay. Love you." He practically sang at the babies. "Wish me luck." And with that he was out the door.

"Okay, he's gunna be gone for a while so I'm going to need you to be quiet and behave because I'm not as good at this as he is. We're gunna eat and then I think I'll put a shitty kids TV show on for a while and we'll go from there." He dealt with the feeding better than he expected and the smile on his face showed how smug he felt about it. Of course that boosted his confidence in his own abilities.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been struggling a lot with writing recently (struggling with a lot of things actually). I've been a bit down and motivation-less so I've not done a lot of anything. I've also been ill and passed out not that long ago (oops). Hopefully I'm getting better now though. 
> 
> Come find and follow me on tumblr and send me a joke to cheer me  
> up. Kinda-magnetic.tumblr.com


	7. The Reward

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's been so long. I thought I'd already uploaded this but I was wrong.

The couple pulled themselves out of bed when Ian's alarm went off.

"Mick, I have to go to work." The redhead said withy groan when a calendar event popped up on his phone.

"You got a problem there then, haven't you? Namely the two small crying things."

"There's a meeting I have to be at that I forgot about."

"They think you're sick. They're not expecting you."

"I haven't called in sick today though. I need to be there and I can't exactly take them with me."

"You want me to handle them alone?"

"Just for one day. Debs will take them home later and we can go back to normal. Call Kash and take the day off. Be honest, tell him you need to look after the kids. It's not like he'll fire you. I need you to do this for me." The redhead took a few steps closer to his boyfriend.

"You dick. You know I'd do anything for you."

"So you will?" He tucked his thumbs under the elastic of Mickey's sweats and pulled the boy closer.

"Of course I will." He leaned up to join their lips. "But you owe me." He said as he pulled away from the soft kiss.

"I know. Thanks. I gotta go in like 35 minutes. Can you make some coffee before feeding the girls? You'd be the bestest boyfriend ever."

"I'm already the bestest boyfriend ever, you dork. I put up with your stupid freckled ass." The brunette quipped as he pulled away.

"You love my ass."

"Not as much as you love mine."

"Yeah. You're right." Ian gave his boyfriend a firm smack on the left cheek. "Now coffee."

"Fine." He emerged from the bedroom and quickly went over to check on the infants before going through to the kitchen to make his boyfriend coffee.

He heard the teacher fussing the babies a few minutes later. His boyfriend really was adorable.

"Hey, Uncle dumbass." He shouted from where he was washing a stray plate at the sink.

"Yeah." Ian made his way through to the kitchen and wrapped his arms around the shorter man's waist.

"Want some toast before you head out?"

"Please." He nibbled at Mickey's neck.

"You know that turns me on. You want me to keep you at home? Ride you into the mattress?"

"If only." The redhead sighed. "Tonight, you ride."

"You dork."

"I know. I really miss the sex though."

"Yeah, me too. But we've lasted longer than this before. We didn't fuck for weeks, remember?"

"Yeah. They say you don't know you need something until it's gone."

Mickey gave him a sympathetic grin. "I'll make you some toast, you deal with the kids, then you go to work, then Debbie picks them up, then you come home and we fuck until Monday."

"Sounds good. I know you'll be okay with them while I'm gone. Uncle Mickey is kinda awesome."

"This'll be the first time I've had to deal with their shit though."

"You've seen me do it. You know how."

"Doesn't mean I want to."

"Which makes it even better that you're going to."

"Right. Fine."

"You're brilliant."

"Believe it or not, and not to feed your ego, but that's all down to you. You changed me, Gallagher."

"I'm pretty amazing like that." He pecked his boyfriend's lips. "I'm gunna finish getting ready."

Mickey let his boyfriend slip away and continued making breakfast.

He'd made the twins' bottles by the time Ian emerged from the bathroom. "Toast and coffee is on the side."

"Mickey's feeding everyone but no one's feeding Mickey." Ian states in a sympathetic tone.

"Mickey will feed himself once he's finished feeding the babies."

"Uncle Mickey to the rescue." The redhead retrieved his breakfast from the side and began to devour it as fast as he could.

"Dork."

"I know." They settled next to each other on the couch. "You look good with kids." Ian's voice was full of admiration.

"Yeah? Something you want to see more often?"

"Nah. I'll let you play uncle every so often but not daddy."

"You won't let me?"

"I want it to just be the two of us forever."

"M'kay." They shared a quick kiss before Mickey put a bottle to Amy's lips.

"I love you."

"I love you, too," the boy responded. "Go to work, Gallagher. We'll see you later."

"Okay. Love you." He practically sang at the babies. "Wish me luck." And with that he was out the door.

"Okay, he's gunna be gone for a while so I'm going to need you to be quiet and behave because I'm not as good at this as he is. We're gunna eat and then I think I'll put a shitty kids TV show on for a while and we'll go from there."

He dealt with the feeding better than he expected and the smile on his face showed how smug he felt about it. Of course that boosted his confidence in his own abilities.

"We happy?" He asked the twins. "I think we're okay, right? We gunna have a good day without Uncle Dork. Your mother will be over later to take you back to the mad house and me and your uncle can go back to normal. He totally owes me for you guys staying over and I'm very happy to take my reward. Maybe he got me a preset." He trailed off, getting lost in his own thoughts. "You've got stuff you're gunna have to learn if you grow up in this shithole of a neighbourhood. Debbie probably won't want to teach you to use weapons but I'll do it. What she doesn't know can't hurt her. We might have to wait a while for that though. You're going to have to be at least 9 before I let you hold a gun. Guess that means I have to stay with Ian for a long time then, doesn't it? If I'm gunna protect you guys, I'm gunna have to stick around. Doesn't sound too bad though. I'm the happiest I've ever been so I think I'll keep him. He's pretty hot too. I could do much much worse. And you're gunna need me. I'm not afraid to tell it how it is. You need something answering, I ain't gunna sugar coat it. Your family are gunna want to protect you but they ain't gunna do it right."

The girls' eyes were fixed on Mickey's pale face, open wide in awe.

"Okay. We're done with the mushy shit. It's good for babies to lie on the stomach, right? I'll be back." He moved to leave the room and tears began to fall down Amy's face. "Shush, I'll be gone for less than a minute." A little anger was buried deep in Mickey's tone as he entered his bedroom.

He reemerged very soon after with a blanket. "I'm back, see." He presented himself to them and the crying ceased. He moved the coffee table to the side of the room and spread the sheet on the floor.

He proceeded to put the babies laying on their stomachs on top of the blanket. "This is supposed to help strengthen your neck or some shit." He turned on a kids show. "This should be a blast." He deadpanned.

There was a knock on the door and Mickey couldn't believe how fast time had flown. Debbie greeted him with a smile as she entered the apartment and made a beeline to where her children lay on the floor. "Hello." She sang as she pulled Amy into her arms. "Where's Ian?" She turned to Mickey.

"Work."

"All day?"

"Yeah. It's just been the three of us today." He picked up Gemma.

"He left them with you?"

"You don't trust me with your kids? 'Course. Of course Mickey isn't capable of being sensible. He can't even look after himself, why would someone trust him to look after others?" He mimicked with a sigh, not making eye contact.

"That's not what I meant. If Ian trusts you with them, I trust you with them. I just didn't want them to be your burden, I asked Ian to look after them, I didn't think he'd leave them for you to deal with."

"We've been fine. It got me a day off work." He played with Gemma's hand as he bounced her against his chest. "Don't be mad at him for leaving them."

"I won't. As long as everything's been okay."

"Are you staying until he gets back or should I tell him you said hi?"

"When's he due back?"

"Half an hour maybe."

"You mind if a stay? I should probably thank him."

"Take a seat. Want coffee?"

"Sure, thanks." He sat on the couch with her daughter voicing on her knee. Mickey handed Gemma over before heading to the kitchen to put the kettle on.

He took a few deep breaths when he was out of sight, relived that the kids were no longer his responsibility and that smothering, mature feeling could die and let him be a kid himself again.

He sometimes struggles to remember that he's only 18. An 18 year old in a committed relationship with responsibilities and cash and bills and shit. Whilst he's normally fine with the concept of long-term these days, sometimes he needs to spend some time alone to remember what his life should be like and remind himself how much better it is with Ian in it.

He made a couple of cups of coffee and took them through to the living room. He placed them both on the coffee table, which was still pulled to one side of the room. "So how are you?" He asked the redhead.

"A lot more relaxed than last time you saw me."

"You've had a good few days then?"

"Lots of sleeping." She stated with a smug smile. "I hope these two didn't keep you awake too much."

"Nah, they slept pretty well. They're lucky they're cute though."

Debbie giggled, actually giggled. "Yeah, they have me around their little fingers. They cry and I come running."

"How are you dealing with it all? You okay with growing up so fast?"

She laughed awkwardly. "Yeah. I want to be a kid again. I'm too young for this. But I'm coping, people are helping when they can and they're not too loud. Things could be worse."

"I know the feeling though. You want to go out drinking and shit but you don't want to at the same time."

"Yeah. But the thing making me stay home is my children, not my boyfriend."

"Same thing applies though. You feel too young to be tied down but couldn't imagine it any other way."

"Yeah. Exactly. I don't want it to change."

"Make sure you leave them here and go out every so often. I'm lucky enough to be able to take my burden drinking with me." He laughed at his wording.

"Thanks. They seem to really like you." She said as Amy stretched towards her 'uncle'.

Mickey blushed and reached for the child. "Yeah, we had fun. I did prefer it when Ian was here though. I wasn't good at dealing with their shit. We managed though, didn't we?" He cooed at Amy.

"Do they need changing now?"

"Don't think so. If they do I think you should hold back and make Ian do it as punishment."

"Punishment?"

"For leaving me. I gotta milk it, get all I can. He doesn't need to know I enjoyed myself."

Debbie laughed and changed the topic to something more mundane.

They chatted idly until the older redhead came home from work. "Hey." He kissed each of the room's occupants on the forehead. "When did you get here, Debs?"

"About a half hour ago."

"Has Mick been hospitable?"

"Yeah, it's been fun. And he deserves a reward because you left him."

"Did he tell you to say that?"

"No." She grinned through the lie. "You need to make it up to him."

"I'm sure I can do that." He sat on the arm of the couch next to his boyfriend and kissed him on the top of the head, laying an arm over his shoulder.

"Ergh, if you two are gonna have sex, I'm gonna leave." She got up and put one of the infants in their car seat.

"We're not gonna have sex right now." Ian piped up fast.

"I know. I gotta go anyway. Thanks for this." She took the child from Mickey and prepared all their stuff to leave. "You did a good job Mickey."

"Thanks." He blushed as she pulled him into a hug. "Anytime."

She moved on and hugged her brother. "Thanks."

"No problem. Bring 'em back whenever. They love uncle Ian, right?"

"Nah, they love Mickey more." He quipped from his spot on the couch.

"Shut up." The older redhead grinned.

"Alright. See you soon." She picked all the stuff up and turned to leave.

"I'll help you to the car with that." Ian took one of the children off his sister.

"Thanks."

The siblings left the apartment before Ian started talking again. In a hushed tone he said "So mick did a good job, right? You're okay with me leaving them with him?"

"Yeah, he did good. I don't know why Fi doesn't trust him."

"Great, tell her that."

Debbie laughed. "Will do."

Ian re-entered the apartment to see his boyfriend lounging back on the couch.

"Now for your reward. Three days of sex starts now." He locked the door dramatically and pounced.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay?  
> I'm going to have a bit more free time now school's out for Christmas but I've had some ideas for writing for another ship so I'm going to be splitting my time. My latest OTP is Peterazar from Lovely Little Losers so if you're interested head over to YouTube and watch the [Nothing Much To Do](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iakDRoQg-sM&list=PLgtRIWtmHefNSmhLGzm87bM6AKzWvD-ls) series. It won't take you long - I watched them all in a few hours - and follow that up with the [Lovely Little Losers](https://www.youtube.com/user/pedrodonaldson/featured) series then come find my work on ao3.  
> Alternatively, don't do any of that and just leave me a comment or kudos to make my day.  
> UPDATE: [I WROTE IT](http://archiveofourown.org/works/5484176/chapters/12673862)  
> 


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